who am i?

One of the things that have been bothering me for quite a long period of time already is the different lianglins you get at different places and occasions. ok, its not that i suddenly morph into some insect or change the colour of my skin to blend with the surroundings..
But its the way i behave or the way that i treat people and react to things happening around me. Its really confusing in a way because with one group of people i am super noisy and outspoken and all, but with some others, i just cant find the anything to say, and even when i do say or does anything, it almost never reaches the desired effect or even goes completely opposite from what i expected..
Sometimes i dont know who i am anymore... and how can i go interact and have certain expectations of other people when i myself is so confused over my own self? In a bizzare way, im like a handphone, can change mode.. silent, loud, outdoors, meeting, blah......... ya know... i really think i have a split personality..
I mean, most of you reading this blog probably sees the me which is the outgoing, gregarious, motormouth guy who just loves to takea dig at almost anything and anyone if given the chance to, and always has this sackful of innuendos to sprinkle in my words to give them a diffferent spin, or to keep trying to make everything i say funny so as to make people laugh, sometimes at my own expense... But i dont have a problem with that. i enjoy making people happy, i enjoy entertaining people, i'd like to think that im quite good at doing that... but at the end of it all, when all the laughter has died down, all the jokes have become stale, and that all that innuendos have just become part and parcel of the identity of me being me, what is left? seriously, if you ask me that, i wont know how to answer you... i'll probaby say brains.... haha... who am i trying to kid? beneath that facade of a guy who loves to sing and carries this wide grin all day, is there any depth inside? Is that all my purpose is? is that all i have to offer to the people around me??
it would be really tragic if that is it..... as cass said months ago, im an introverted extrovert.. someone whom all that he shares is up to a certain point, then the rest of me is hidden behind the smiley face and the "big blown up" personality... really... who am i?

well, the other side, hahaa.. come find out ourself......
scared yet?